Wednesday, February 01, 2017

A new love drug?


Many moons ago, I asked the manager of the safari camp if he used Viagra.

“You cheeky ape!” he squealed. “Why would a man like me, in the prime of my life, need Viagra?”

“Even men in the prime of their lives can suffer from flaccidity at the point of coital engagement,” I replied. “I read about this in an issue of Cosmopolitan I borrowed from your good lady wife.”

“Is that so?” said the dagger-eyed manager. “Well let me tell you, my hairy friend, that at the point of coital engagement I’m as flaccid as a flagpole made of granite. And don’t ever quote stuff from Cosmopolitan to me, it’s a highly overrated magazine that encourages women to be judgemental and dissatisfied.”

I thought of this tetchy exchange after hearing about a new wonder drug that stimulates the erotic impulse. It’s called “kisspeptin” and a trendy young journalist called Mirandi Larbi wrote this about it:

Researchers from Imperial College London injected 29 guys with kisspeptin and found that it boosted the brain’s response to pictures of couples in sexual or romantic situations.

This seems to suggest it’s a drug for the voyeur rather than the lover, but perhaps the two are closely related. I remember watching a horrifying film called American Psycho in which a narcissistic young banker watches himself on TV while cavorting with a pair of strumpets. And what about couples who have a mirror on their bedroom ceiling? You wouldn’t endure the embarrassment of hiring a workman to install one of those things unless you got a big kick out it.

It wouldn’t surprise me if this new drug becomes more popular than Viagra. I read somewhere that the blue pills give men the granite flagpole without increasing their desire to use it. That’s more like a bicycle pump than an aphrodisiac. Kisspeptin, by contrast, sounds more like one of the love potions you read about in medieval fairy tales. It ought to work for women as well as men. Although it may not be powerful enough to make a fairy queen enamoured of an ass, it might well give women the soft and gooey sensations they need to get in the mood for it. Who could possibly complain about that?

Of course, there are teething problems that will have to be sorted out, the most obvious one being the use of injections. I can’t believe humans will be desirous of hanky panky after being pierced by a sharp piece of metal. A woman doesn’t want to be thinking of needles when she’s about to be penetrated by a broader, if blunter, instrument. Creating kisspeptin pills would put the drug on a level playing field with Viagra, but I would advocate a nasal spray as the optimal solution. My old circus buddy, Smacker Ramrod, always stressed the role of his olfactory organ in whetting his carnal appetite. I would go so far to say that he thought of the nose as a secondary sexual organ. 

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Comments:
Would that make it Love Potion Number Ten?
 
the BRAIN is the biggest sex organ.

I have never met any man who uses viagra. and my sex ship sailed many moons ago.
 
if you build it, they will cum.

(i still saving for a robot)
 
Smacker Ramrod? I dated a Smacker Ramrod once. Couldn't be the same one. Was he fond be being tied up before being "pierced". No drug need here. I have pheromones all on to myself in told.
 
And all this time I thought it was an anti-cancer drug.
 
Pop Tart: I haven't been keeping count, Ms Pop Tart. But, yes, it could be that many!

Anne Marie: The brain IS a sexy organ, Anne Marie. But probably second in size to the jahoobies in your case. :)

Mr Rosewater: The robots will be for people who don't do drugs.

Mistress Maddie: I don't know all his secrets so it could be the same man, Mistress! Did he have a big nose and a British accent?

Exile: How else could Mick Jagger still be fathering children?

Jono: It might be good for that too. Have you noticed how horny people never seem to get cancer?




 
I'd rather my men use Viagra than that kissypep stuff, GB. Why watch when you can be a recipient? That's why I always ask? Or at least that's what I asked here.
 
Granite flagpole? Don't knock it.
JP
 
I've never met a guy who uses viagra but this kisspeptin stuff might also catch on for those who want it.
 
I don't mind needles at all. I find getting tattoos sensual. (I'm not covered in tattoos or anything, in case you're wondering. I only have two.)
 
The key to the article you cite is the drugs use for potentially treating depression. I know I have no feelings of depression when my wife allows me to service her. If people engaged in more copulatorty activity, life would be far happier.
 
Robyn: It's possible to do both, Robyn. Ever thought of having a mirror on the ceiling. ;)

Itsmyhusband: You don't knock something like that without getting knocked back.

Mary: Would you test a free review sample, Mary? :)

Shoshanah: But tattoo needles don't penetrate deeply, do they? They also make a nice buzzing noise.

Pipe Tobacco: Wise words, Professor. You ought to have your own radio show - or would you prefer TV?


 
Hmmm seems like in Victorian times, men rarely saw women scantily clad so when they finally did it was more thrilling. Now seeing a sexy woman is more common than seeing a bacon cheeseburger.
 
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