Wednesday, August 24, 2016

The making of Britney

Once again, I find myself thinking about Britney Spears. Not in a lurid or lustful way, I should hasten to add. I feel like an ornithologist observing a rare species of parrot and wondering what’s going on inside that birdbrain. This time, it’s the title of her new song that has me flummoxed. “Make me” is what it’s called. It’s the kind of thing a pina colada would say to a barman if the pina colada could talk. However Britney isn’t a cocktail, so what does she mean by that two-word instruction?

If the song were about food, it might be short for “Make me a possum burger”. I’ve never thought it remotely likely that Britney was a vegetarian – her sharp white teeth and hungry eyes remind me of a female hyena. Although she probably doesn’t screw up her nose at fast food, I’m sure she prefers fresh road-kill, skinned and sliced by an unkempt backwoodsman with a bushy beard. There was a rumour that she acquired a taste for squirrel when she was a girl, but she claims she only petted the critters.

But perhaps I ought to listen to the song before speculating about the meaning of its title. There might be a few subtle hints in the lyrics about what she’s asking for. Come to think of it, I can look up the lyrics directly without even listening to the song. Here’s a selection of some of the more pertinent lines:

I just want you to make me move
Like it ain't a choice for you, like you got a job to do
And make me oooh, oooh, oooh, oooh...
And make me oooh, oooh, oooh, oooh...

I think we can safely deduce that she isn’t talking about burgers. The last two lines seem to be saying “Make me moan like a harlot”, but the first two lines are more opaque in their meaning. “Like you got a job to do” could mean she’s hired a gigolo to pleasure her, but why would she need to tell him that? A gigolo would already know he had a job to do. What Britney is really saying, I suspect, is “Make me pregnant”. That’s the kind job she has plenty of history in asking for, and I don’t believe she’s done yet. The “ooh oohs” in the last two lines could be labour pains.

Now I’m aware there’s a video promoting the song, which could provide further clues about what it all means. The problem is that the current video is actually a replacement for a previous one that was withdrawn. A show business gossip site has revealed that the original video was axed because it was “too sexy”. “Too sexy for what?” I’d like to know. This earlier version should be re-instated in my view. Let Britney express herself freely, so we can scrutinise her movements and assess her desires and intentions. We won’t get to the bottom of this subject if people keep on censoring the evidence. 

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Isn't that a jungle song, GB, with all that "ooh ooh ooh" stuff? I seem to recollect a tune to that effect: "ooh ooh ooh ee ee, I wanna be like you ooh ooh ee ee." But the "make me" part is still baffling.
I hope she had help with those lyrics.

It's like with Justin Bieber's "Baby," where eight people were credited as songwriters.

I can't even picture what that many people would do on a song in which the primary lyric is the title. "You know, Justin, this part in the bridge where you discuss the way photons entanglement in quantum physics? Can we take all that out and just have you sing "baby' a few more times? What does everyone else think?"

Anyway, Britney's not a young woman anymore. If she's moving around as much as she claims in the song, she ought to be careful not to break a hip...
this broad (like madonna, j-lo, beyonce, mariah, gaga, etc.) is past her "sell date".

THOSE are lyrics? pul-LEEZE!

and people wonder why I listen to classical music (disco music is my naughty habit).
It’s the kind of thing a Pina Colada would say… I love that imagery. "Make me, make me, that’s right, fill me with your coconut cream …mmmmm….more…my juicy little pineapple…”

Anyway, back to Britters - She is a lyrical genius. I wish she gave classes.
Leave Britney alone. Let her be all sexy and whatnot. I do appreciate your apparent obsession with her. 'Make Me' happens to be the title of the last Jack Reacher novel written by Lee Child. That expression has been around for a long time but the fact that it was used just recently leads me to believe that Britney has run out of ideas and is plundering the bestseller lists for titles. It that possible?
Hooray for Britney. She lasted onger than most in pop music. Now some of her songs appear on musak.
Robyn: I remember that song well, Robyn. It was sung by an orang-utan called King Louis. Trump ought to make it his campaign song.

Nasreen: Britney is no spring chicken, I'll admit, but she might be of an age when female sexual desire has ripened to its full potential. She could eat Bieber for breakfast.

Anne Marie: I never realised you listened to classical music, Anne Marie. Why don't you show us your favourite classical tunes on Saturday?

Jules: You sound as if you wouldn't mind being a Pina Colada, Jules. I'd like to read your story if you did become one for a day.

Exile: I never would have guessed it's been around for a long time. Someone must know what it means then, right? I doubt Britney is aware of the book - maybe she heard the expression on TV. I wouldn't describe my interest in her as an "obsession" - I show similar avuncular concern for a number of vulnerable young ladies.

Pop Tart: Is that so, Ms Pop Tart? Some day I'll have to start listening to them.
Spears is IMO just about getting attention, no matter what form. Good or bad attention, it does not matter.
"I just want you to make me move"?
Maybe she's singing about a laxative...?
I've never been a big fan of her music.
I think your speculation about what the song is about was better and more interesting than the actual song. Also, is Brittney 40 now? Jesus, that makes me feel old. Way to "make me" feel old, Brittney!
i can't imagine brittney even coming close to the gold standard of videos, nicki minaj's anaconda.
I didn't even know Britney was still in the music biz.. anyway I must check out this vidya
Pipe Tobacco: Who can tell whether it's good or bad in this case?

Al: Better a laxative than a suppository. I doubt Britney has much fibre in her diet.

Mary: I'm sure you've heard more of it than me, Mary!

Dr Ken: She's not 40 yet, Dr Ken! That's her retirement age!

Mr Rosewater: I think I once wrote something about Nicki Minaj. Isn't she a potty mouth?

Jimmy: Please do check it out, Jimmy. I'd like to read an objective review of it.
Ha! Oh Britney, she's getting old but still always finds a way to make her voice heard.
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