Wednesday, September 30, 2015
Foot fetish
I hooted with glee on discovering that Madonna had ordered one of her backup dancers to kiss her feet. The luckless dandy was a few minutes late for a rehearsal and tried to placate his mistress by apologising profusely. “Kiss my feet!” demanded Madge, and the obedient fellow promptly dropped to his knees and smooched her perfectly pedicured tootsies. I hope he got a round of applause for his trouble. It takes a lot of courage to mess with a cougar’s paw, even if the cougar has asked for it.
I’m sure a lot of people will condemn Madonna for behaving like a bad-tempered queen in a medieval fairy story – a haughty tyrant who demands that her courtiers abase themselves for relatively minor indiscretions. In my view that would be missing the humour in the incident. In this day and age, the arrogant celebrity deals with errant minions by firing them on the spot without a reference. Ordering someone to kiss your feet is pure theatre – as well as being a quick and painless way of putting the incident to bed. I’m sure the dancer was mightily relieved he could atone for his misdemeanour in such a speedy and conclusive manner. He certainly wasted no time in obeying the command.
And let’s not forget that there many who would enjoy kissing Madonna’s feet and consider it to be a great privilege. Although I am not of this disposition myself, I would rather kiss her feet than any other part of her anatomy. They may not be as dainty as those of a Japanese woman, but they are surely sufficiently smooth and supple to make the experience tolerable. After they have been washed, I would guess they are the organs on her body least likely to give the kisser cooties.
Now some of you are probably wondering whether anyone has kissed my feet. Before answering this question, I should point out that a gorilla’s feet are not like those of a human. They are actually like a second pair of hands, which means I can toot out a tune on my recorder while shaking a pair of maracas with my feet. If you paid your respects to me while I was lying in my hammock, you would probably end up shaking hands with my foot.
No one has ever kissed my feet in the jungle. I’m quite certain of that. Kissing has no emotional significance for the hairy primates, so foot-kissing would be viewed as an evil perversion rather than an act of servitude. To curry favour in our community, you’ve got to groom your companions and scratch their itches.
I’m not so sure about my circus days, though. I definitely had human fans who would have kissed my feet if I’d allowed them to. And a few overexcited individuals did take liberties with my person before I could shake them off with a reprimand. But did any of these scallywags molest my feet? I’ll be damned if I can remember.
Labels: foot-kissing, humiliation, Madonna
Comments:
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ew (that last pix). I don't play dat. and I don't want to be anywhere near madge; who knows where she's been!
I have had foot play with long term partners, after of course, they were bathed....and I have always been a huge fan of Madonna, but as she gets to be a old lady, she is getting very strange...even pass diva status. How easily she forgets where she came from. Excuse my mouth, but had I been the dancer, I 'd probably have told her to go fuck herself royally, and told her to take the job and shove it.
@mistress - yeah, I second that. time for madge to hang it up, along with the rolling stones and a few other people.
I have a lot of time for Madonna. She's a woman who knows what she wants and goes out to get it and doesn't give two sucks of a big toe what people think. That in itself deserves admiration. I think she's earned the right to be diva-esque and a bit off the chart.
Foot play is an odd thing. Once upon a time I went to a Farmers ball and after a lot of dancing and snogging of champagne bottles I fell into a comfy chair at the side for a rest. Within seconds, some burly farmers son with a posh accent and milking fingers, fell to my feet, took off my shoe and began to taste my toes. I was both petrified and entranced. I ended up kicking him in the face when he hit a tickle spot.
Foot play is an odd thing. Once upon a time I went to a Farmers ball and after a lot of dancing and snogging of champagne bottles I fell into a comfy chair at the side for a rest. Within seconds, some burly farmers son with a posh accent and milking fingers, fell to my feet, took off my shoe and began to taste my toes. I was both petrified and entranced. I ended up kicking him in the face when he hit a tickle spot.
Anne Marie: You mean you've never had a toe-job, Anne Marie? You gotta try everything once!
Mistress M: Your mouth doesn't need my exoneration, Mistress! How about telling Madge that you'll kiss her feet if she kisses your butt first?
Billy: That's peanuts for her, but she may be too proud to pay for it.
Pop Tart: So you don't think they're faking pleasure for the camera, Ms Pop Tart?
Jules: A farmer's boy wouldn't know how to give you a toe-job, Jules. He'd be more familiar with hooves than feet. You need someone with a little more finesse. :)
Mary: Yes, it's hardly even a fetish these days. Don't all women like a foot massage?
Al: You have my permission to blow it up and enlarge it.
Mistress M: Your mouth doesn't need my exoneration, Mistress! How about telling Madge that you'll kiss her feet if she kisses your butt first?
Billy: That's peanuts for her, but she may be too proud to pay for it.
Pop Tart: So you don't think they're faking pleasure for the camera, Ms Pop Tart?
Jules: A farmer's boy wouldn't know how to give you a toe-job, Jules. He'd be more familiar with hooves than feet. You need someone with a little more finesse. :)
Mary: Yes, it's hardly even a fetish these days. Don't all women like a foot massage?
Al: You have my permission to blow it up and enlarge it.
Well, it sounds like Madonna was just joking around. Madonna seems like a pretty chill chick compared with many of these celebrity goofballs I read about.
I would TOTALLY kiss Madonna’s feet. And she wouldn’t have to order me, either. What a great story to tell the grandchildren! I wouldn't kiss your disgusting maraca-shaking paws, though. Disgusting.
I had to click on that last pic just to insure it was vile. I'll have to click on it again later tonight just to make doubly-sure.
I had to click on that last pic just to insure it was vile. I'll have to click on it again later tonight just to make doubly-sure.
I LOVE Madonna. At the Met Ball-- right on the red carpet she made designer Jeremy Scott bow down to her & kiss her hand--- after all she is The Queen.
nope nope nope.
when I go for my every-other-month pedi, I get a foot massage and it is very relaxing.
footsies are strictly walking appendages for me, nothing more.
when I go for my every-other-month pedi, I get a foot massage and it is very relaxing.
footsies are strictly walking appendages for me, nothing more.
Britteny Spears announced that men can suck her toe. I don't know, GB. If I'm going to get sucked or kissed, I don't want my feet to be the lucky body part.
Jimmy: I think you're right, Jimmy, but would YOU have kissed her feet?
Exile: Well, don't kiss anyone's feet unless you're first asked. A man who kisses feet without being asked loses his dignity.
Cocaine Princess: Thanks for that snippet of information, Miss Princess. She obviously does want the regal treatment - I suppose it's a way of maintaining dignity in the later years.
Anne Marie: A foot massage is something I would trade you for a bunch of bananas!
Robyn: You deserve to be sucked and kissed on any part of your body you wish, Robyn. I wish I had seen Britney's announcement - she doesn't usually express herself with such clarity.
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Exile: Well, don't kiss anyone's feet unless you're first asked. A man who kisses feet without being asked loses his dignity.
Cocaine Princess: Thanks for that snippet of information, Miss Princess. She obviously does want the regal treatment - I suppose it's a way of maintaining dignity in the later years.
Anne Marie: A foot massage is something I would trade you for a bunch of bananas!
Robyn: You deserve to be sucked and kissed on any part of your body you wish, Robyn. I wish I had seen Britney's announcement - she doesn't usually express herself with such clarity.
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