Wednesday, October 09, 2013

Exposing Hillary

A cry-baby movie director is complaining that no one will help him make a biopic about Hillary Clinton:

"When I approached people for interviews, I discovered that nobody, and I mean nobody, was interested in helping me make this film,” whined Charles Ferguson.

He sounds like a frustrated village gossip who’s annoyed because all the local snitches are shunning him. In his opinion, this refusal to spill the beans is a betrayal of American democracy:

“I don't think it's a victory for the media, or for the American people," he declared pompously.

The man is an ass and I’m glad his insidious project has been scuppered. You can bet your bottom’s last dollar that the film would have shown Hilldog in compromising positions with other women, which would have brought aid and comfort to the enemies of the United States, who are the last humans on Earth who deserve to be aided and comforted.

Speaking as a gorilla, it wouldn’t worry me at all if Mrs Clinton were a Velcro vixen. If any woman has earned the right to be a lesbian, it’s her. When you’ve been publicly cuckolded by a succession of empty-headed floozies, you’re fully entitled to a few private dalliances of your own, be they Sapphic or otherwise. But that doesn’t mean a Nosey Parker film maker should pry into your personal affairs and tell lurid tales to the world and his wife.

In any case, these Hollywood directors can’t be trusted to give an accurate depiction of the facts. The accursed Oliver Stoned served up a giant barrel of buffalo piss about the Kennedy assassination, which the ignoramuses of our time lapped up like cream from the she-elephant’s udders. The human masses have had their fill of fictionalised political codswallop and don’t need a film about Hilldog to shave further points off their waning IQs.

Oddly enough, the Republicans are also against the film, because they think it would give the former first lady unfair publicity for her next presidential bid. Now I’d like to see a woman in the White House as much as the next ape, but surely Hillary has missed the boat. She’s beginning to look like a crotchety old spinster whose finger shouldn’t be on anyone’s nuclear button. And don’t forget about Bill, who would insist on moving back with her so he could scent-mark his former territory. It would be like a remake of Debbie Does Dallas with the same cast as the original.

Of course, you’ve got to give Hillary credit for inspiring women to get into politics. Even a girl like Miley Cyrus, who is a novice in political affairs, is talking about her plans for world domination. One has to wonder what office of state she plans to hold, given that she’s telling everyone what a bad bitch she is. If I were president I’d appoint her Chief Dominatrix to make sure all the whips and nipple clamps were being used correctly. She could start by giving lessons to the Senators’ wives.

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i already know everything i need to know about hillary. i don't think a day has gone by in the last 10 years without seeing her on tv or reading about her exploits on the net.

young miley seems more interesting.
I dunno...Hillary, Cher, Bruce Jenner...I could go a dogs age without reading any more about them, and feel better about not only myself but the world around me.

Actually, the sight of any politician these days turns my stomach. How did the U.S. get in such a mess? My solution is to get money out of politics. Serving as a politician should not be a road to riches.
Hollywood really is scrapping the bottom of the ideas barrel these days.

Why doesn't the director exercise his 1st amendement rights (or whatever) and just make it all up?
I'm ashamed to say that the body of the text lost me at "A..." but one quick question please - why the photo of Nana Mouskouri?
That guy making the movie about Hillary is obviously a dumbass who doesn't know the first thing about prying gossip out of people. Perhaps he should hire famed gossip reporter Perez Hilton to give him some tips. With regards to pint-size Miley, I think she is suffering from some sort of delusional megalomania. She looks like she weighs about 85 lbs. If she was a dude and going around with an attitude like that, she would have been shoved in a gym room locker and forgotten long ago.
What a pity Hilary and Bill couldn't have made more use of their common ground and shared a floozy or two. Then everyone would have been happy including the local laundrette.
Billy: Do you know about the women she's had sex with, Billy? I don't even know whether they exist.

HermanTurnip: I haven't heard any news about Cher for ages. How is the old horse?

Jon: I think you've got to wait until they're dead to make stuff up like Oliver Stoned. You could probably get away with making a film about a fictional first lady who got cuckolded and later ran for president.

Sir Hutson: Nana Mouskouri would never dye her hair blonde and I'm not 100% certain she's alive.

Jimmy: I never realised Miley was so tiny. Maybe she's trying to compensate for her lack of size by being strident and wanton. Do you think she'd get on well with Hillary?

Steve: That's the dream many married men have, but how often does it happen in practice? I suspect Bill and Hillary have quite different taste in women.
Gorilla, perhaps at first. Then eventually they would become jealous of each other, and claw out each other's eyes out with their kitty paws.
Hillary knows how people should live their lives and if she could be King she could make them do it! As it is she gets to wear her black leather and crack her whip only in private. She should team up with Miley. With Hillary's brains and Miley's mouth, they could drive Washington to insanity. Oh wait. That's already happened.
A movie about Hillary would cure insomnia. I do like her, though. As masculine as she is, she has a good shot at the White House.

It's not over for her yet...she still has the gas to get the car there. (please...please...please...) And if it was okay for Eleanor's okay for Hill.

Extra bananas for you, Sir.
A crotchety old spinster cannot be a velcro vixen. Though I'm sure Hollywood would be good at this type of tripe.

Can Hillary twerk like Miley?
HE could try to get people involved by mashing up the Hillary biopic with that god-awful Miley documentary (I didn't watch it, I just assume it's awful) xx
Velcro Vixen? That is TOO funny!
I've said it before and I'll say it again:
If I were a woman, besides being an ugly broad, I'd be a lesbian.
No way I want to canoodle with dudes.

I think Miley is trying hard to shed away from her Disney image as was the case with so many other Disney stars such as Hilary Duff and Selena Gomez, and I think a lot of people are partially to blame for that. They can't expect Miley to be Hannah Montana forever.

Jimmy: That a depressing possibility, Jimmy. I would hope Hillary took her under her wing like a second daughter.

David: Yeah, they'd make a good team. I'd like to see them do a dance routine together.

Robyn: So has she decided to run again? The uncertainty of not knowing is killing me!

Megly: You're rooting for her too? I suppose she must have a chance with so many supporters. I would have campaigned for her if she'd run in '92 instead of Bill.

Juliette: I doubt it, Jules, but she's not too old to learn. Would your mother be interested in twerking lessons from a gorilla?

Scarlett: There's already a Miley documentary? She's only 20 for heaven's sake!

Al: How much time would you spend playing with your boobs?

Cocaine Princess: I never saw her as Hanna Montana, so her twerking routine was my first look at her. I think she has comic talent.
I always thought of Hillary as A sexual myself...I mean I am sure both Hillary and Bill were loaded on alcohol and or pot since Bill didn't puff but not inhale it...when they had intercourse(and I say intercourse cause Bill I sure doesn't remember it) that one time Hillary got pregnant. Having said that ... I just don't see her as sexual at all...So, being that I really don't find anything at all interesting unless there is at least a sexy edge to it...No need for the documentary
correction did puff but not inhale
My dear GB- 'Velcro vixen'... I might have to use that term from time to time. There are so many interesting topics to make a movie about...'Hilary loves Miley' for example. The touching coming to age story of how Hilary learned to twerk during her brief affair with Miley. (One of my personal faves).
Thank you for stopping at my blog and I followed you home. I am so glad you dropped by, as I found your delightfully humorous blog. I appreciate your wit.
Hilary is a lezbo? Maybe she likes sex just as much as Bill, just different kinds.
I'm really not liking this Miley phase, GB. She's like a teenage thug you can't reason with.
Hillary wears amazingly thick spectacles when not using contact lenses. I guess that this is what lesbianism does to older women. I thought she was a very competent Secretary of State and probably deserves to get the Democrats' ticket in the next Presidential elections - assuming she's not totally blind by then.
JTILIS: I'm pretty sure Monica asked Bill whether he was still having sex with Hillary and he said yes. The man was just too horny not to boink any woman who crossed his path, including his wife.

Auri: Velcro vixen is a term of endearment I'd be happy for you to borrow, Auri. As for Miley and Hillary, I'd like them to be running mates.

Mazanita: Thank you, ma'am, you're most welcome to drop into my menagerie.

Dr Ken: Bill allegedly said his wife has licked more c***s than he has. It may all be nonsense, of course.

Jaya: It's helping her sell records, Jaya. Maybe she's smarter than she looks.

Yorkshire Pudding: Does lesbian sex make you blind? I thought that was masturbation...
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