Friday, April 06, 2012

An enterprising man


Nobody seems to have a good word for Patrick Stewart these days. The disapproving tongues began to wag when he started consorting with women several decades his junior. The latest one is a jazz singer called Sunny Ozell, who reminds me of the Brazilian beauty queen who turned out to be a transsexual. (I cast no aspersions on her femininity by saying this – Brazil is famous for its authentic-looking shemales, and Patrick Stewart isn’t the kind of man who wants more than one dick in his bed.) 

I well remember the chorus of reproof that greeted the news of their budding romance. Most of the hostile reaction was obviously jealousy and sour grapes, but a few sober heads wondered what a couple so disparate in years would have to talk about. My own gut feeling is that conversation plays a minor part in these May-to-December relationships. One thing I learned in my circus days is that nubile young women are prone to flights of fancy. Having grown up watching Star Trek: The Next Generation, Sunny must imagine she is hurtling through space at warp speed whenever Patrick takes her for a spin on his moped. I dare say he repeats all the famous catch phrases to reinforce the illusion of boldly going where no jazz singer has allowed him to go before. 

It disappoints me that people have accused Sunny of being a gold-digger. There is absolutely no evidence that she intends to marry Captain Picard or otherwise milk his considerable assets. Why can’t people just accept she might have a fetish for older men? Aren’t women allowed to be eccentric? 

The case of 21-year-old Kerry Trebilcock is a good illustration of how quirky the human female can be. She has confessed to eating about 4000 dish sponges seasoned with a variety of condiments. Kerry remembers the first sponge she ate: 

"I took out a new sponge from a packet and had an overwhelming desire to eat it. I sat down with a glass of water and chewed the sponge until it was gone. It tasted of nothing but I found eating it enjoyable." 

It isn’t every day you find a woman with such a powerful natural urge. Let’s hope she finds an eligible bachelor who can see her potential. 

Getting back to Patrick Stewart, what can he do to improve his image? If I were his publicist, I would advise him to befriend an animal species and sing its praises. John Cleese got into everyone’s good books by making a documentary about lemurs, which drew attention away from his own turbulent private life. If the public associated Patrick with a charismatic creature, they might give him more leeway to sleep with women less than half his age. 

What species would be suitable for him? Obviously not gorillas, who are far too hairy to be courted by a follicly-challenged human. The ostrich looks like the ideal candidate to me, being an entertaining bird without a famous human champion. The resemblance of Patrick’s bald head to an ostrich egg would be a fitting point of convergence. 


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Comments:
From the look of Patrick's face in that photo I'd say he was trying to dislodge a couple of stubborn Klingons from his engine room...
 
I always employ the half your age plus seven rule.

If the person is younger than that, I disregard the rule.

As to his intentions? who knows, but if you click with someone enjoy it, life is to short.
My grandfather enjoyed the company of many younger ladies, he was in his late eighties they were in their early seventies.
 
I've nothing to add here, really, except to tell you that I admire your writing style.

:-)

Pearl
 
Oh, this post hit home! And had me laughing out loud at the moped bit – hadn’t known this was a universal aspect of the May/Dec. phenomenon… ;)
 
Hmmmm.....eating sponges. Hmmmmmm
 
Love is blind they say... Oooops, or was it lust?
 
Pretty much women are interested in men of status. If they are interested in some guy in high school because he is the captain of the football team or an athletic superstar, or some old guy because he has tons of money...They are both shallow and/or superficial reasons to like someone. And from the men's standpoint they are using their power or status to entice women to be with them, which is also kind of shallow. Hot chicks probably gave Patrick Stewart the cold shoulder before he was famous because the dude is bald. Now chicks finally like him because he is rich and famous. How is the dating world for gorillas? Are things as messed up as they are on the human dating scene?
 
isn't Thailand known for its authentic-looking shemales too, GB?
i do find Roberta Close really hot though.
 
Steve: I would say he's ordered Data to dislodge them and Data is taking no prisoners.

Charlie: It seems your grandfather had an eye for the younger lady. I hope they didn't tire him out before his time.

Pearl: Thank you, Pearl, I shall strive to remain stylish.

Beth: Do you prefer older men too, Beth? I have nothing against the moped. We pedestrians prefer vehicles that are easy to push away.

Groovy girl: Are you going to eat one, Miss Groovy? I'd like to read your review!

Hannah: I think Patrick was acclaimed a beautiful man around 20 years ago and appeared on magazine covers. It seems some women find the bullet head sexy.

Jimmy: Biologic instincts are powerful for both humans and gorillas, so females are drawn to the alpha males. I'm not sure Patrick's bald head is a turn off for all women. Maybe you should do a survey to find out what chicks really think about it.

Jaya: I believe they are called 'ladyboys' in Thailand, Jaya. The Brazilian ones are less feminine, but possibly more voracious.
 
I think that they make a very pretty "Mutual arangement" (I won't use the term "couple", that has too many clichéd connotations everywhere except Hollywood). Sunday mornings must be a hoot in their household - Sunny screaming jazz solos while Patrick shouts 'Make it so, Number One, make it so'.

I have never understood or approved of the social mores regarding matin' and such. Technically one is supposed to be attracted to intelligence, breedin' and character. Well, technically I have in my stables 'orses and 'ounds with more intelligence, breedin' and character than anything on the London Ball circuit and yet such relationships are frowned upon. Why even now, in StarDate 57-63-42-96-110a I have prosecutions pendin' ... odd world, very odd.
 
I figure that people should mind their own business. She's 31 not 19 and last time I checked, that means she is a grown woman.
Sure she is probably with him for his $$'s but what's that got to do with me? Nothing. And ... maybe she isn't!
Love is love..
:D
((Hugs))
Laura
 
any criticism of gurney halleck, patrick stewart, is pure blasphemy.

he's mentoring the young lass.
 
At least Pat now has a real reason for saying, "Beam me up"!
 
"conversation plays a minor part in these May-to-December relationships"

love this line :)

wish people would stop worrying whats under the frock...sigh..


thanks for popping over to my blog :)
 
I just say it's not up to us to tell people how to live there lives and wouldn't like it if they told us how to live ours.Live and let live.
 
That guy? Really? He gets the young babes? He must have a very big...wallet.
xoRobyn
 
Think he says, "Engage!" when they do it. Gawd, I hope not.
 
The Owl wood: That's very understanding of you. I hope the Captain and his first lady invite you and your horses to their wedding.

Laura: Quite right, Laura. Captain Picard would a great catch for any woman - even Beverley Crusher had a thing for him in spite of being a grieving widow.

Billy: Yeah, he must have taught her a lot of stuff, like how to put a good shine on his head. Maybe he's even given her acting lessons.

Time Warden: Wasn't that Kirk's line? I wonder who William Shatner is squiring these days.

IWBY: I don't think people will ever stop worrying what's under the frock, ma'am. Humans are too inquisitive.

Cassam: Yes, it's wrong to tell him what to do. And pointless too. A star ship Captain doesn't listen to advice from people who've never left the solar system.

Robyn: Don't sound so surprised, Robyn! There are a lot of trekkies in the world and some of them are women.

Fred: 'Engage' is a command he gave to his subordinates, so he'd sound like a fool to give to himself and a lazy ass to give it to her.
 
Or maybe people should just stop judging every single thing people do? If he likes her and she likes him, so what? Regardless, I got a chuckle from your post! Ostrich. LOL
 
Let him do what he wants. If she's a gold digger, it's his own money that's going to go.

I feel bad for the poor girl.

Eating sponges. Wow. I have chewed on sponges before, i will admit, but they are fun to chew and i could never eat them fully. and soap just tastes disgusting.
A link from that article talked of women eating polish and sofas.
I am in awe.

OSTRICH BABIES! CUTEEE!
 
Looks to me like Patrick is havin' a grand ol' time. His eyes can't seem to focus, so little Miss 1/2 his age must be rockin' the Captain's enterprise. WHOO HOO!!!!
 
I'm a bad man.
I saw that picture and was instantly drawn to her naughty bits.
Captain Picard can do anything he wants. If he wants to "make it so."
I'd have that goofy smile on my face, too, by the way.
 
EmptyNester: Hello and welcome, Mrs EmptyNester. Do you like ostriches? I think they're under-appreciated birds!

Tabs: You like chewing sponges? Suppose little bits break off in your mouth and you have to spit them out? Bubble gum seems much easier, you ought to try it.

Keeping it real: You can tell what a man's been doing from the look in his eyes? It must take a lot a practice to do that!

Al: That's why you're not a starship captain. Picard could resist the temptation to look at naughty bits when engaging with another vessel.
 
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